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We Met & We Made it Official
He sent me a message on Facebook, asking if I remembered him from a previous night at an underground concert venue. We hit it off, and had a date at Pelham Bay Park. He paid for the food, walked me to the bus, and seemed like such a sweet shy guy. I was 15-years-old, he was 19-years-old. -
6 Months In "Look at All I do for you"
We went six months without any issues except one. He cursed me out, because he waited 30 minutes for me underground and couldn't get in contact with me. It was no big deal to me, it was just hot and he was frustrated. On our sixmonth anniversary he took me to Coney Island. The whole time he talked about how much money he had to borrow to do this, how I should stay out later then my curferw to be with him, and how next anniversary I better do something for him because 'it's only fair'. -
Eights Months in "You are Fat and a Cheater"
He started accusing me of cheating and the insults became a daily thing. If I was ever with another male, it would cause a huge fight. Eventually I let go of any guy friends. Everyday was a fight. I never did enough, I never looked good enough, I never sexually pleased him enough. I had to do more. I believed it too. I believed every insult that came out of his mouth. Why would someone who said they love me, lie to me? -
He Almost Hit Me
It was his friends and mine. It was a great night, we didn't fight all day. We were drinking at Pelham Bay Park. It was so cool that my boyfriend could get us alchohol. As we were walking back, me and him started to play fight. I accidently hit him in his private area. Before I could say sorry, he was coming at me. I closed my eyes, waiting for a hit, but his friends held him back. It was okay though, he was just drunk, right? It was my fault. I should have been more careful. -
A Year and a Few months "Numb"
Eventually I started getting used to all of it. The threats, the accusations, the insults. Not seeing my friends as often. It was apart of our routine, it was normal. I only told my family and friends about a few arguments. I made sure I put him in the right light. I didn't bring him around my house very often. I began to skip meals in order to lose weight for him. I would apologize for the way I look whenever I saw him. He didn't try to hit me again, so it was all okay in my eyes. -
My Eyes Opened
The arguments were getting worse. My family started to notice me change. I was in a super market with my father and sister, and he kept sending text messages. He was angry I wasn't responding fast enough, he didn't beieve where I was, then the last threat came. He promised me he would hit me before we were done. I looked at my sister and father and knew enough was enough. I broke up with him. -
He Didn't Leave
When we first broke up I had to turn my phone off for hours, because the calls and texts were constant. The insults and threats didn't leave. He threatned to beat my best friend at work, burn my house down, torture my cats, and many other terrible things. He would call my mother and say disgusting things about me. We attempted to put a restraning order on him, but the detective didn't really see our situation as serious. I had to changed my number. -
My Family Wasn't Safe
He went to my house to look for me, but luckily I wasn't home. My father and brother were there instead. He refused to leave so my brother threw him to the ground and beat him, until he agreed to go. Before he left he said this wasn't over. -
He was Still There
I was in college, with a new boyfriend, Ernie far from my mind when I receive a phone call. It was my sister and she was scared, the house had been robbed. It was Ernie. When he was arrested my parents made a deal with him. They wouldn't press charges if he would leave us alone. -
It Gets Better
He mostly kept to his word. He never went to the house again or contacted anyone in my home, except for me. I still occasionally get messages from him. He'll send an e-mail, create a new Facebook to add me, or attempt to follow me on Instagram. I block him on all social media sites and ignore the e-mails. I still find myself hearing his insults in my head, but it does get better.
