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1.1 Entering Adolescence
In the first of the Four Ages, Childhood and Adolescence as a rising clarinetist I spent fewer waking hours with family and more time independent time with school activities. I was 10 years old and puberty began. Also, the physiological change began with physical development and a strong attraction to the opposite sex. I gained a true sense of independence. My parents changed from positive reinforcement to negative reinforcement. -
2.1 Maturational Timing
Overall, my pubescent development was average although at the time it did not feel as if this was the case. Looking back, I began experiencing the gonadarche stage close to age 11. A few girls in my class experienced precocious puberty and as a result gain the attention of the boys. As many of us from 10-12 years were already obsessed with our body image. -
2.2 Niche-picking
As I entered adolescence, I decided I wanted to become a member of the church youth choir. The choir traveled together to fun places and sang at various events. I worked really heard to become one of the leads, but really what I wanted was to become famous. -
4.1 Gender Intensification
Gender intensification is unspoken intensity to accept gender roles. I rejected gender roles as I felt there was (is) more to me than what those roles had to offer. I have since learned that there is honor in those roles with flexibility to be the person I was created to be. I enjoyed the outdoors very much and felt the socialization pressure to be more "femine" and I was but within my ideas of who I was. -
3.1 Social Cognition
When I was 15, I was sitting outside with my cousin on our front porch. A van filled with my friends drove by a couple of times and I waived each time. The third time they drove by, they stopped and asked me to come out to the van to talk. They waited 2-3 minutes and I ignored them. Eventually they drove away.I felt so bad, but in the formal operational stage I was in, my cousin was my imaginary audience who would ridicule me. I found out later that he did not care one way or the other. -
6.1 Parent Adolescent Conflict
My parents especially my dad tried to managed any signs of egocentrism my emphasizing that all people had gifts. My parents and I conflicted over my idealistic views that I was going to be rescue by a prince-like man and escape life on the farm. I grew up in a rural area an had the ideal that the city life was the luxury life. little did I know. My expectations about my outcome changed drastically when I moved to the city. -
3.2 Real Versus Ideal, True Versus False Selves
Pre-adolescence I want to compete with the boys. I have changed now. I now want to look pretty and say nice things. Not the swear words I used to use. I care a great deal about what boys think of me so I am trying to change, but then they throw me a football and I find myself pretending I don't want to play.The boys know I want to join them in a basketball game and laugh at my changes. This part of of my life is difficult as I contemplate my real versus my ideal self. -
6.2 Stimulation
My friends are who I depend on. If I am having a rough day or feeling lonely I look for them as soon as I get to school. I can be myself around my friends and they can be themselves around me. We even have a secret language. -
6.3 Social Comparison
I try to where clothes that are unique and what I like. This is hard sometimes as others might laugh or make negative comments about what I am wearing. My friends tell me the truth. How do I know this? Because we share outfits. Them being so honest helps me not to compare myself with others but enjoy my own identity -
8.1 Rites of Passage.
As I was coming of age, I began to feel the freedom making my own decisions. I desperately wanted a job in high school but my parents would not allow me to so that I could focus on school. For a while I resented this as I saw it as a coming of age ritual. I sign of independence. -
3.3 The Unconscious Self
I woke up this morning being sorry for everything I have done to disappoint my parents. I know I can't change the past but I want to be more helpful to my parents after all they are getting older. I remember in church the Bible says to honor your father and mother. I realize now today they won't be with me always. This is my first realization at age 17 of my unconscious self right before graduating from high school. -
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1.2 Emerging Adulthood
I entered adulthood suddenly when I gave birth to my son. Initially, I was unstable due to inexperience. There was conflict and great responsibility. I had to establish economic and social independence and pursue I viable career. Also learning to live with an intimate partner was new to me since I had only lived with my parents. -
7.1 Transition to College
The transition to college was the most impactful. For the first time in my life I am experiencing diverse cultures and beliefs. Since I went to school with the same group of people most of my life this is a culture shock. It is very competitive and I am not used to this level of competition. It was very stressful as I was no longer the best but in a sea of over-achievers. -
7.2 Transition to Work
I graduated with an A.A. and decided to put college on hold since my parents told I need to get a job. I promised my self I would return to school but for right now I need to earn money. At work I am eager to please my boss and am immediately as the youngest person working in the publishing company given a supervisory role. I earning good money and am determine to do the best I can. My parents are very proud of me and this helps to fuel my enthusiasm. -
7.1 Intrinsic Motivation
I was intrinsically motivated when after I had graduated with my A.A. I was given the responsibility to supervise two employees. I felt a sense of self-responsibility as I had to own my emotions and deal with conflicts professionally. This was rewarding. Also, I became determine to succeed in this role as I did not want to let myself down. While at work I was fully engaged in the tasks of the day and accepted the direction of my supervisor respectfully. This was a turning point for me.