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Early Childhood: Initiative vs Guilt
My parents went through a nasty divorce and I was stuck in the middle. My mother was a toxic, abusive, narcissist who made me feel guilty for having any emotion towards anything that was going on. I learned early on that trying to communicate my needs resulted in eye-rolls, being called "dramatic" and "needy" (I was 5 so...), and that my emotional needs came secondary to whatever was going on in my mother's life. -
Adolescence: Identity vs Identity confusion
My lifelong love of music leads me to take vocal lessons, and then apply to colleges to study opera. I throw myself at the music gods and immerse myself in the musical culture. This immense love for music sets me apart from some of my peers, but I find it cathartic and make new supportive friends. I feel I can be myself around these new friends, and learn that it's okay to be different and have your own opinion and identity. This trait still stands today. -
Early Adulthood: Intimacy vs Isolation
I met my husband after several failed romances. But I knew my worth, and held out for someone who held the same ideals. I wanted a good, successful partnership to share my life with someone! He checked all the boxes and then some, and we got married after knowing each other for 6 months. He's a fantastic communicator who never makes me feel inferior, and understands my need for good partnership. He's my confidant and my lifelong partner, so far 13 years strong!