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Grandparents
Both fraternal grandparents and maternal grandmother dead. Limited resources for the passing down of language and traditions. -
English or Spanish
Pediatrician trying to determine if older sister has reached the stage of talking appropriately. Sister does not perform as expected and pediatrician asks parents if they are speaking English and Spanish to her. When answer is given, pediatrician determines confusion over which language to use is why sister doesn’t perform correctly and one language needs to be utilized in the household. My parents, coming from a time where speaking Spanish at school was punished, chose English. -
Birth
I am born as the second child to Patrick and Adriana Guillen and the second girl. My parents continue to teach and speak only English to us, despite the fact that my only grandfather could not speak English well. -
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Leaving San Antonio
We move from San Antonio to Lytle. In San Antonio, our neighbors were selling drugs and gun shots were fired one night. Lytle was maybe 1500 people at that time, but it was a world away from San Antonio. Everyone seemed to be related to everyone. If they weren’t related, then they had known each other since Kindergarten. And above all else, everyone was in everybody's business. I have to say I am glad and so grateful that my parents did not have this small town mentality. -
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Religion & Family
Raised in Catholicism. My father’s family all remain Catholic during this time, but my mother’s family is different. My Tia Mica, the youngest sister, joins a non-denominational congregation. My mother’s other sister, Dora, does not attend church. Due to this split, my Tia Mica does not allow my cousins, who are the closest to our ages in both families, to visit. Our family gravitates to my father’s family, which is liberal in their views on everything. -
Different
There was something different about my cousin Steve and my Aunt Rose, but I didn't understand until I was 13 that Steve and Aunt Rose were gay. I remember thinking about this for a short while and then moving on as if nothing was different. My thoughts went through lessons from my Catholic upbringing, but my father’s family never shunned these relatives. My thoughts again returned to my Catholic upbringing which told me that I should love everyone, and so I did and do. -
Brother
I come home to find my brother has “slept” with a friend of his. My mother spoke to my sister and me and told us not to scold my brother. We were also forbidden from calling him names or treating him different, even if he went against what we were all taught through catechism. This is the first time I realized there was different standards for my sister and me when it came to acceptable behavior. -
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Pregnant & Unmarried
I have to tell my parents that I am pregnant and not married. My mother allowed everyone to lecture me about what I had done and then did not to talk to me for three months. While my parents seemed progressive in their parenting of my siblings and me, it became apparent there was slight sexism in the house. Even though my mother was the more devout Catholic in the house, she seemed to believe my brother’s indiscretion was okay due to the fact he was a male. Mine was unforgivable. -
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Happy Single Mom
I and my son’s father are try to work as a couple. My Aunt Rose tells me one day “If you love him, then mija I wish you both all the best, but if you are not sure and are just trying to make your situation seem right in some people’s eyes, don’t marry him. A child is no reason to marry someone and we all love you, no matter your choice. We will all be here to support you.” After much deliberation and maturing, I did not marry and remain happily, unmarried today. -
Education
I graduate from the University of Texas in San Antonio because I refused to be another single Mexican mother who was not educated. I also wanted better career opportunities to provide a better life for my son. -
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Challenge to my son
I begin my Master’s degree. I want to prove to my son that, despite working full-time and being a single-parent, anything is possible, so he has no excuse not to achieve all his dreams!
