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One this day superbrat was first introduced to the world -
Owen had his first crush!
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Owen experienced heartbreak.
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Mom: "I like my suitcase!"
Me: “A few months back I served a table with five people who ate and drank all night. I had a great time with them but out of the blue, they completely blindsided me with a $2 tip on a $120 check. Unfortunately for him, he paid by credit card. My head chef has a soft spot for me, so he found that guy’s phone number. Every time we are out partying after work, he gets a wakeup call at 1 AM, 2 AM, whenever.”
Mom: “That’s… that’s illegal!”
Me: "Womp womp triple big Mac!" -
Owen had a 5 foot growth spurt and got made fun of for basically touching the sun! He still sucks at sports!
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Owen is nicknamed the Crash-Out Queen!
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Owen Always sings espresso by Sabrinia Carpenter because he likes her but she won't date a 90 foot ogre