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Self Sufficient
Asking for help is a difficult task for many. Today's society emphasizes self-reliance, and seeking assistance is often seen as "weak" or "unnessecary". The belief that one needs to rely on themselves alone is known as Self Sufficiency Syndrome. “There are short-term payoffs that self-sufficient people experience.. Yet, when self-sufficiency is taken to the extreme, the burden of too much responsibility can cause stress, unrealistic expectations, lack of self acceptance...”(pg 13) -
How to ask for help and offer assistance
To combat self sufficiency, one has to apply the ACT acronym. The A stands for finding out what your Afraid of, The C is for letting go of Control, and the T is for Trusting others. Many are prone to perfectionism as well. “Our expectations become so high that no one else can meet them and we're burning out because of them."(pg 14) Aiding others is also stressful, no one wants to come off as "annoying" but "By offering before they need to ask you, you are showing that you care about them"(14) -
How offering help affected someone I know
A friend of mine was driving in an unfamiliar area, trying to find a Bakery she had ordered a specially made cake from for her sister's birthday.Her phone died so she couldn't find directions online. She was circling a block several times, looking for the store. Eventually, she pulled to a stop and was freaking out. A man with a sign, presumably homeless started to walk up, thinking he was going to ask for money, she locked her car doors and was prepared to politely say "sorry." -
Story part two
Much to her surprise, the man instead asked if she was lost, she had been driving around for awhile. She explained what happened, and how it was imperative that she got the cake that day. He helped her find the bakery and all was well. She was so moved by the selflessness of the man she stopped on her way back, and bought him water, and some food. The look of gratitude he had made it all worth it, they each made each other's days. “It usually doesn't take much to help another human being out.”